Fire
by Ilyik
Summary: ABCs of Writing prompt. Rey and Ben live in the same apartment complex. What happens when a fire forever changes their relationship?
1. Fire

**A/N: So here we are again! Another letter! F is the theme for this one. Let's see how long it goes! There are plenty of F words out there, I'm sure... Enjoy! R&R!**

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**FIRE**

_Chapter 1: Fire_

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Rey had been living in the same apartment complex for years. She'd come to see how many people came and went. She knew that there was a neighbor she didn't particularly care for. He was so aloof. He was so... brooding. He seemed like trouble. They'd passed each other collecting their mail and she'd even had to deliver mail to his apartment that was accidentally shoved in her box. Ben Solo. Sounded like a play on words. Has he really been solo all this time? She chuckled at the thought. What kind of name was that? Was it really Benjamin? Benny? Or was it just _Ben_? She played with the name off and on throughout the time he became a tenant. But she never really pushed it. If he wanted to use an alias, then so be it. But at least pick a better one!

She checked her mail and sighed as she saw a lot of Ben's things in her box. As she flipped through the mail, she noticed a card that came for her from her friend Finn. She smiled and opened it, Ben's mail under her arm forgotten. She read the card and giggled at Finn's eagerness and chatty behavior. Even in writing, he was so wordy. She smiled as she leaned against the wall, reading silently. She smiled and folded it up. He was getting married in a few weeks. To Rose. She was so happy that those two decided to become official. They were good for each other. Included was a wedding invitation and Finn urged her to bring a guy with her. She sighed indignantly. There was no way she would bring someone. She was fine being single. She was better off on her own. She thought a little to herself. Maybe...

No. She walked up the stairs quietly, holding Ben's mail under her arm. When she reached the top of the stairs, she saw him standing at her door. She tilted her head curiously. "Can I help you?" she asked as she approached.

He turned to her and held out her mail. "Apparently, the mail person can't figure out our apartments are different. I swear they're dyslexic."

She took her mail from him with a small smirk. "I suppose it's easy to mix up 202 and 220," she said with a small grin. She held out his mail. "Trade ya," she said as he took it with a sigh of irritation. "Could be worse," she said as she walked to her door and unlocked it.

"How?" he asked as he glanced over his shoulder at her.

She impishly looked out her door at him with a wide grin. "I could be ordering inappropriate things in your name," she teased as she stuck her tongue out at him.

Ben's face blanched at her suggestion. "Inappropriate," he scoffed as he stalked to his room, his face turning a bright shade of red when it sank in.

Rey giggled and went into her own apartment, closing the door behind her. She thought more on their brief exchanges. She'd been getting more playful with him lately, she realized. Maybe it was just her figuring she would tease him a bit since they interacted so much. She didn't know what started it. Maybe it was because everyone else feared him or was extremely wary of him. He seemed lonely, but not all bad. He seemed like trouble initially. She was still on the fence, honestly. There were some days where he was in such a terrible mood that it seemed he could go off on anyone and anything. But then there were days where he was just... standoffish. Today was a standoffish day, so she teased him. But on his bad days, she usually just leaves him alone. She didn't know what to really make of him.

Shrugging it off, she walked over to her kitchen and started to make herself some dinner. Afterwards, she'd go to bed early.

**X~X~X~X~X~X**

Rey awoke several hours later, coughing and smelling something burning. She sat up in bed and coughed more when she realized that there was a fire somewhere close by. Her eyes widened as she stood from her bed and fell to the floor. She coughed more and more and felt her vision blurring. No, she couldn't do that. She had to go. She had to get out. She crawled on the floor, staying low as she could as smoke typically rose. She coughed violently as she made it to her living room. She heard footsteps and screams fading in and out of her ears. Everyone was running. Everyone was panicking. She felt the ground rumbling from everyone fleeing for safety. She felt her vision start to teeter again and just as she made it to her door, she opened it and collapsed onto the ground, her vision going black.

**X~X~X~X~X~X**

Ben had woken up not too long before Rey. He coughed as she opened his door and saw everyone running down the hall to exit the building. His thoughts briefly went to his neighbor. Did she make it out? She was the only one that ever really spoke to him. She was the only one that didn't look at him with fear. Rey was her name. He'd learned that from her mail. He pushed onward and coughed more as he exited his apartment when the crowd cleared. He'd made his way down the stairs and out the building, his eyes scanning the crowd of tenants. He looked around at everyone's faces. When he didn't see her, he wondered where she had gone to. Then he heard a woman come out, screaming, "There's a young girl still inside! Please! Someone help her! I'm not strong enough to lift her from the second floor down!"

Ben rushed back into the building, flames shooting out of the entrance he came in through. He coughed more and rushed up the stairs quickly, taking long strides with his long legs. When he made it to the second floor, he looked through the thick smoke, coughing violently as he frantically searched for the girl that was still here. When his eyes landed on a body lying in the walkway, that wasn't there before, he rushed to her and lifted her into his arms. He rushed out the building, his shirt over his nose to keep out as much as possible. When he made it outside, the woman from before cried in glee that he had rescued her. "You're such a brave man! Thank you so much!"

Ben walked over to the ambulance that had shown up and laid her on the gurney, at the EMT's request. He watched nervously as the EMT did his job, trying to get the girl some oxygen and figuring out what was going on with her. "Do you know her name?" the EMT asked.

"Rey. Rey Skywalker."

"Age?"

Ben hesitated. "19?" he questioned, not really sure, but going off of what he'd heard from the other tenants. They were always talking about her. How she was a sweet girl, so young and not even 20. He'd listened and paid attention, and he was glad he did.

"Relation to her?"

"Uh... neighbor." Ben hesitated.

"Is that all?" EMT asked, glancing over at Ben incredulously.

Ben sighed. "My mother's brother adopted her. So... cousin?"

"Hop in."

Ben's eyes widened. "Uh... no, that's-"

"You're the closest kin at the moment. Please get inside. We need to go to the hospital." Ben hesitantly got into the ambulance.


	2. Friend

**A/N: Yay! Chapter story! Let's see how it turns out. It's difficult finding F words that go with the theme... The medical side in me needs to do this part to be happy! So I'll try to explain as we go so I don't lose anyone. Enjoy! R&R!**

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**FIRE**

_Chapter 2: Friend_

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It had been hours since he had gotten into the room with her. He'd made a trip back to the apartment where he retrieved the things the hospital was looking for, like her wallet, any signs of meds, etc. All she took was vitamins, which made it easy on him because he didn't really want to be that personal with someone he literally just made passing remarks to. Secretly, he wanted to know more about her. But because of the situation, he couldn't really find out what he wanted to find out. He knew she was an adopted cousin of his, but in all honesty, she'd cut ties with Luke as soon as she left his home. They barely kept in contact. Ben didn't keep any contact with his parents or his uncle. His father was dead to him and his mother just nagged him to come home, so he cut her off, too. Both of them were dead to him. Luke... Ben couldn't really forgive Luke. Luke had put him through so much. He'd tried to destroy everything he had because Ben didn't just go with the flow that Luke was trying to force him to do. Ben was his own person, the black sheep of the family, and so, he'd been ousted. Or rather, he ousted himself.

He had tried to make himself scarce from Rey's room when the doctors came in, but they insisted that someone needed to know what was going on and she didn't have any emergency contacts listed, so he was the best they had. He stayed reluctantly, not really understanding what was going on, so he asked questions and received answers. Apparently, she'd gotten carbon monoxide poisoning, that they were currently trying to treat. Ben knew it was possible to get that, but he didn't know how badly Rey had sustained it. He asked what they were going to do for her and the doctor just sighed. Apparently, they could only keep her on oxygen and give her breathing treatments of Albuterol and such. Ben had asked them how long she would be asleep and the doctors couldn't answer, of course. They had told him, though, that he had pulled her from the environment at just the right time because any prolonged exposure would have killed her. His heart ached at that. If he hadn't gone back in, and waited for a firefighter to go in to get her, she'd be dead? He couldn't deal with that. She was the nicest person he'd met and to lose this little ray of sunshine in his dark life would be tragic.

He continued to ask questions of the doctors as they came in, giving him status reports. They'd taken blood tests. They'd increased oxygen and bronchodilators, which apparently opened up the lungs that the carbon monoxide had restricted so that oxygen could get into her lungs and restore her to her proper balance. And apparently, they were giving her antibiotics as well to fight any infections that could have come from a compromised respiratory system. Ben hated all this medical jargon. Just call it the lungs. Goodness... She was steadily improving as the days went on, but the doctors insisted that she be kept a little while longer for observation. He had no choice. He had to stay. If he didn't, she'd wake up alone. She'd been out for three days. Ben had decided that he would go home early in the day, take a shower, grab some food (a whole bag of it so he didn't have to keep leaving because what if he missed the doctors?) and come back to sit with her. He'd brought books to entertain him, but his mind still wandered, his eyes dancing off the page to her beautiful face. Before he knew it, he'd closed the book and taken to staring at her, watching for any signs of distress or peace. It had gone on like this for three days.

On the fourth day, he decided to go home early to get some food and such. He also decided to swing by her apartment and grab her some clothes. With one last longing look at her, wishing she'd wake up soon so they could continue their silly banter, he exited her room and went home.

**X~X~X~X~X~X~X**

Rey's eyes fluttered open a little while after Ben left. She glanced around from her propped up position and blinked several times to clear her blurry vision. When her eyes finally focused, she realized she was in a hospital room. Curiously, she tried to think back what happened to her. But her head started pounding. She let out a soft groan and clamped her eyes shut as the lights started to assault her head. She opened her eyes again to see a doctor standing there. "Your friend isn't here..." the doctor said off-handedly.

"Friend?" she asked hoarsely. She didn't have a friend. Was this man off his rocker?

"Yes, the young man that's been sitting with you for four days? You don't know him?" Rey thought about it and closed her eyes again. "Well, it doesn't matter. Anyway, you're making a great recovery. Stark contrast to three days ago. We should have you discharged tomorrow." Rey opened her eyes at the doctor. "Sound good?" Rey nodded. "Good. I'll- ah! There you are." Rey glanced over at who the doctor was talking about and saw Ben walk into the room, carrying a backpack. He froze in the doorway as his eyes met Rey's. "I was just telling her that she's probably going to be discharged tomorrow. Would you be able to arrange a ride home for her?"

Ben broke eye contact and looked at the doctor. "Sure."

The doctor nodded and smiled at the two. "Great. I'll send the therapist in and finalize everything so we can have you guys out of here tomorrow."

With that, the doctor was gone and Ben stood uncomfortably in the room close to the door. It looked like he was ready to bolt at any time. He hesitantly glanced over at her and saw her staring at him, waiting for an explanation. He sighed and walked over to the chair he'd been occupying for the past few days. He set his bag down and looked over at her. "You're awake," he commented and instantly kicked himself for it. Smooth move, Solo...

Rey snorted and rolled her eyes. She sighed softly and felt a hitch in her throat, making her cough. He waited for it to subside, but it wasn't, so he got up and got her water cup. He handed it to her and she sipped from the straw silently. "What happened?"

Ben took the cup from her when she was done and set it on the table. "The woman in 280 started a fire and burned down two apartments. The rest of them have smoke damage, which they're working to fix. They're starting from 280 to the front, so yours still isn't done." Rey looked at him as he took a seat. "I've been going over there to check on everything. I mean, you can't very well live in a hospital, can you?" he asked with a grin.

She gave him a small smirk and shrugged. "I don't know... It's not too bad. I've gotten used to the whole... blinding whiteness of it."

Ben smirked at her. He noticed her voice was hoarse, which the doctor had informed him not too long ago, that it would clear up a little later. "Can I get you anything?"

Rey looked at him curiously. "Answers?" Ben nodded. "Why are you here? Not that I mind..." she said softly.

He sighed and leaned back in the chair. "The EMT asked me to ride with them here." Rey looked at him, clearly lost. "You were my uncle's ward, so I was the closest they had to family for you. Sounds weird saying that..."

Rey blushed. "So you're... my cousin?"

"I said I was. But I'm not. The adoption didn't officially go through. You may have the Skywalker name, but you're nothing." Rey didn't know why that hurt so bad, but it did. Her eyes fell to her hands in her lap. "You're nothing..." he repeated. "But not to me."

Rey looked up at him, brows furrowed in confusion and a little residual hurt. "What?"

Ben sighed and sat back up, leaning closer to the bed. "When you're well, I'll explain," he said with a small smirk.

Rey pouted, but didn't fight him. "So if my apartment isn't done tomorrow... then where am I going to go?"

He shrugged. "There's room at my place. My place is already done, so if you want, you can stay there until your place is done. Should only be a night or two. You can have the bed and I'll take the couch." She thought about it for a moment, blushing at the thought of staying the night at her neighbor's house for a couple of nights. They weren't even dating and here she was staying the night at his place. He sensed her discomfort and he hesitantly reached out to lay his hand over hers. She stiffened under the delicate touch, but she looked at his face. He looked sensitive, almost compassionate. It was a look she wasn't used to seeing from her scowling neighbor. "If that makes you uncomfortable, we can find another place for you for a few nights."

She thought about it for a minute. He knew her so well. How? How would he know what made her uncomfortable? How would he know that she would be comforted by him holding her hand? Why was this all right with her? She gave him a small smile. "Your place is fine." Ben nodded with a small twitch of his lips. "You're not a creep, are you?"

Ben snickered. "Certainly not." He pulled his hand away and resumed his spot, relaxing in his chair. "Just don't look under the bed." She quirked a brow at him. "It's where all the dead bodies are." She couldn't help but laugh at him, shaking her head and laying back against the pillows. "Get some rest, Rey."

She forced her eyes open and looked at him. "Are you... leaving?" she asked hesitantly.

He considered it, but with her silently asking him to stay, he wasn't so sure now. "No?" he asked, unsure of what she wanted him to do. He wasn't really good with dealing with people, so he couldn't really read what she wanted. He hated questioning himself, but he couldn't be confident about his answer because if she would feel better about him leaving, he would do that, too. He was a mess...

She seemed to nod quietly and relax back against the pillows with a small shy smile. Ben knew then and there that she wanted him to stay. He opened his backpack and got out a book, settling in to make himself comfortable. She was asleep before he knew it.

**X~X~X~X~X~X~X**

Rey awoke the next day and looked over at the chair to see Ben sleeping, book flat in his lap, forgotten. She smiled over at him. She didn't realize how boyish he looked when he was sleeping. He looked so vulnerable. He looked peaceful. Usually when she saw him, he was always scowling or really upset about something. He looked lonely. Like he was reaching out, but no one was taking his hand. Had she? She thought about it and realized that... she had. He was searching for someone to talk to, someone to understand. And she was the one that took his hand. It started with some passing remarks, but maybe she'd made it more comfortable with joking with him? She wasn't sure. She would definitely need to ask him. When her voice was better, of course.

She saw him shifting in his sleep, the book clamoring to the ground with a loud thud. His brows furrowed for a moment and then he opened his eyes. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, palms flat against his eyes with a sigh. When his hands fell from his face, he looked around briefly, as if orienting himself. Then his eyes landed on her, who was watching him with a small shy smile. He returned it with a small twitch of his lips, a ghost of a smirk. "Sleep well?" she asked with a hint of mirth in her voice.

He noticed her voice wasn't as hoarse as yesterday and couldn't help but shrug. "They need to think about the caregivers more," he snorted. "Feels like I'm sleeping on a step ladder." Rey couldn't help but snicker at him, which brought a small smirk to his own face. "Hungry?" he asked mischievously.

"Starving." Ben reached into his backpack and pulled out two bags of chips. "I don't think I'm allowed to have those yet..."

"What they don't know won't hurt them. Which one?" Rey hesitated. "Look, if they come in, just throw me the bag and we'll play it off."

Rey laughed and shrugged as she pointed at a bag of chips, earning her a grin from Ben as he opened it and passed it to her. He opened his own bag and set it in his backpack to hide it when he took the other back from her. He watched her take a chip and she sighed happily. "This is amazing," she moaned as she all but squealed at the taste. Ben chuckled softly, earning Rey's attention. He stopped and put his own chip in his mouth. That's when he noticed her staring at him. "You should laugh more often. It sounds nice," she said as she put another chip in her mouth with a smile. Ben's cheeks heated up at the compliment as he looked away and quietly ate another chip. "I think that's the first time I've actually heard you laugh, come to think of it..." Ben said nothing and didn't look at her. He kept his gaze focused on anything but her. "Why?" she asked softly.

Ben didn't really know what to say. He simply shrugged. "Not much to laugh about, I suppose. I never really... paid attention to it."

"I laugh at myself sometimes." Ben looked at her curiously. "Yep. Sure do. When I have nothing to laugh about, I find something to laugh about. It keeps me from becoming depressed."

"I'm not depressed."

"You're lonely. And that's a recipe for depression," she said back, eyes hard as she looked at him. Ben frowned at her. He felt his anger rising, but before he could say anything, she kept talking. "I'm not attacking you, Ben. I just... see how unhappy you are. Do you have any friends? Besides me?" Ben looked away with a scowl. "Ben-"

"Stop. This isn't going to be a therapy session," he bit out, glaring at her to get the point across.

Rey frowned. "I'm not a therapist, Ben." He looked away from her. She huffed at his attitude and rolled her eyes. "I'm happy around you, too," she blurted out. Ben didn't look at her. "I look forward to the little exchanges we have when we give each other mail. I can tell when I can joke with you and when it's best not to. Ben-"

"Stop." Rey frowned at him and watched him quietly.

"Ok, Miss Skywalker. I have your discharge papers... Uh... were you cleared to-"

"Sorry, sir. I set them there for a minute to get my stuff together. She didn't eat any," Ben said as he took the bag back and closed it up.

The doctor raised a brow at them and shrugged. "Anyway. Here's your discharge papers. You're free to go home now. Here's a prescription that you need to be on for a few weeks, just to make sure there's no infection that develops. The other one is for any trouble breathing, use it as needed. Do you have a ride home?"

Ben nodded. "Taken care of."

The doctor nodded. "Great. Then sign here and we'll get you on your way. Do you have a change of clothes?"

Rey opened her mouth with a blush, but Ben reached in his pack and pulled out some clothes for her and set them on the bed. She blushed at him and looked down at her clothes he'd gotten for her.

"Well... seems your friend has everything covered. I just need a signature stating I gave you everything and you understand your discharge instructions." Rey signed the paper and the doctor left.

She looked at Ben, who said nothing as he avoided her glance. She frowned as she looked down at her hands in her lap. "On second thought... maybe I should make other arrangements..." Ben looked at her then. "You don't really seem to..."

Ben sighed as he stood and crossed the short gap between them. He pressed his lips to hers quickly, pausing there for just a moment to let it sink in to Rey that this was real. When he pulled away, his eyes searched hers, as if boring holes into her very being. "Come home with me."


	3. Fold

**A/N: Ok. So Ben took a leap last chapter. Let's see how it turned out for him! Enjoy! R&R!**

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**FIRE**

_Chapter 3: Fold_

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They made it back to Ben's apartment in silence. Neither had spoken a word since Ben asked her to come home with him. It was an awkward silence, as if they were both fumbling for words to say, but not finding them. Rey was struggling to come to grips with the possibility of dating this man, and Ben was struggling to stop beating himself up for making such a bold move when he didn't know if his feelings were returned. He didn't want to be friends. He wanted more. But did she? It was too late now. What if he just made it extremely awkward? This was going to be a long couple of days...

He walked through the door silently, leaving it open for her as she stood in the doorway and just peeked inside. She was unsure about this. It wasn't like they were going to _do_ anything, right? So she supposed it was safe. And he didn't seem to be a pervert. If he was, he would have jumped at her when she made the inappropriate thing comment before the fire. She stood in the doorway in her thin blue T-shirt and her dark blue jeans. She stepped through the door, like a timid cat that was out of their element. She closed the door behind her and her anxiety started to shoot up, as if she were trapped inside as soon as the door clicked. "Coffee?" he asked, making her jump out of her skin, turning to him with wide eyes.

He seemed unfazed at her being startled, but inside, he was a little disappointed. Was he really a monster in her eyes? Had he ruined what was the beginning of a really nice relationship? All because he didn't know what else to do. He felt backed into a corner and didn't know how to continue the conversation, and he wanted her to come back with him because he truly wanted to help her. He didn't want her to feel like he didn't want her to come back, like he was retracting his offer. Because he wasn't. But how would he have been able to explain that to her? He wasn't really good at expressing himself. He was more of an action kind of guy, so to be able to put that into words eluded him. And he regretted it now. He didn't know how he could turn things around. Maybe he couldn't...

She gave him a small smile. "Sure," she said as she walked over to the counter to stand near him. He nodded and started to make the coffee silently. He leaned against the counter quietly, glaring at the coffee pot. She picked up on his uneasiness and looked around his apartment from her position next to him. "Do you have any games?"

Ben glanced over at her, quirking a brow at her. "No?"

She hummed in acknowledgement. "I have cards at my apartment? I could go get them?" Ben just stared at her, trying to wrap his mind around what this girl's deal was. Did he look like the type to play cards? Did he look like the type to play any sort of game? "It would pass the time...?"

Then he realized how uncomfortable she was. Like she was trying to find a way to deal with it. A distraction. "Sure."

Rey's eyes brightened up as she shot him a grin and rushed out of his apartment to go to her own. He banged his head on his cabinet in frustration with a sigh. He was so stupid. Why was he so stupid? He ruined everything. He made her so uncomfortable and now she didn't even want to be in the same room as him. He was such an idiot!p His brows furrowed in frustration as he glared at the coffee pot, as if that were the cause of his issues. Seriously, he couldn't think of anything at all to say to her? Was she trying to avoid what happened? Was he just being impatient? Possibility on both... he supposed. He let out an annoyed groan at himself as he banged his head on the cabinet again. "Stupid," he whispered to himself.

"Uhh... are you ok?" Rey called from the doorway. Ben made no effort to move. She walked closer to him and gently put her hand on his shoulder. He didn't look at her. She ducked under his arm that was outstretched to rest against the cabinet and looked up at him, effectively pinning herself between him and the cabinet. She realized how close they were and she couldn't bring herself to care. "Ben?" she asked. He looked down at her then and straightened himself up. "What's wrong?"

"Headache," he said simply as he poured coffee. He handed a cup to her, which she took with a small thanks and poured himself one.

"I'd have one, too, if I banged my head on my cabinet," she said as she helped herself to the sugar on the counter.

He cursed under his breath, low enough for her to not hear what he said, but loud enough for her to hear him mumble something. "Sorry."

She looked at him curiously. "For?"

"For earlier..." he said as he added sugar to his and got the milk from the fridge, offering it to her.

She took the milk and poured it into her coffee, making it a light brown color. "I'm not." Ben's eyes shot over at her then, as if what she'd just said was the meaning of life. She handed the milk to him nonchalantly and just stared at him. "What?" He hesitantly took the milk and poured some into his own coffee before putting it back in the fridge, not sure of what to say. "Why are you sorry?"

"It's awkward," he said as he leaned against the counter again, avoiding her eyes again as he opted for staring at the rising steam from his coffee.

Rey shrugged. "Only if you make it that way." She sipped her coffee quietly. He noticed a change in her demeanor. She was a lot more open now. As if the initial shock of being in his apartment had passed. It was slightly easier to talk to her now. "I do have a question though..." She looked at Ben for permission and he hesitantly nodded for her to continue. He set his coffee on the counter and his eyes met hers then. "What did you mean when you said... I'm nothing... but not to you?"

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked in a level tone.

She shook her head. "Why are you avoiding the question?" she teased as she sipped her coffee, just prior to setting it on the counter. "Is there something you're hiding, Ben?"

Ben grinned at her challenge before pushing off of the counter and walking in front of her. He leaned close to her and set his hands on the counter on either side of her. "I like you and this little... friendship we have," he said, not daring to label it as anything else. She gave him a small smirk and tilted her head up to meet his challenge. "And if you're not sorry..."

"Are you going to do it again?" she asked with a grin that he mirrored.

"Maybe... maybe not," he said as he stood up suddenly, leaving Rey there to send a half-hearted glare his way. "You look disappointed."

Rey shrugged as she walked past him. "Let's play a game of poker. Each hand you win, you get to ask a question. Each round I win, I ask. Loser has to answer. Deal?"

Ben nodded and walked over to the table. She started to shuffle the cards and dealt them quietly. After a few minutes in silence, Rey won. "Are you telling the truth, or are you messing with me?" Ben looked at her curiously. "With what you said at the counter."

"I'm honest." He dealt the next hand and after a few minutes, he won. "Did I make you uncomfortable?"

"Not at all." She dealt the next hand and when he won again, she sighed. "Again?"

Ben grinned. "Was that your first?"

Rey blushed a little and looked aside. "Maybe..."

"Loser has to answer, remember?"

She sighed. "Yes."

Ben nodded and started to kick himself even more. He was her first. Did she regret it? She said he didn't make her uncomfortable with it, but... if that was her first, and it was him, did she regret it? That would be the next question if he won again, he thought. Rey dealt again and after a few minutes, Ben won again. "With it being your first, do you regret that it was me?"

Rey looked at him and squinted in disbelief. "Do I regret that it was you? What does that mean?"

He shrugged. "If I had a choice about it, I would want it to be mutual. It wasn't exactly mutual."

She looked at him sadly. "Why are you being so hard on yourself?"

"I'm not. I'm stating facts," he replied. "Are you going to answer?"

Rey glared at him. "I regret nothing."

Ben nodded and dealt the cards. She stared at her hand and frowned before she laid down her cards and showed that she won. "Do _you_ regret it?"

"I would have done it differently, yes."

"How would you have done it?" Rey asked as she looked at her cards he dealt to her.

Ben didn't answer. He knew exactly how he would have done it differently. He didn't need to answer the question though because she hadn't won. Yet. But it looked as if he was going to lose this hand anyway, so she would have her answer. He frowned as he thought about it. How would he tell her the answer? How could he possibly communicate something so deep and... _personal_ to her? He wasn't the best at communicating. Sure, he was educated and knew how to express things in a sentence, but when it came to expressing _feelings_? That was a whole different ball game that he wasn't prepared for. He couldn't do it. "Fold," he said as he laid his cards down and leaned against the chair, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"So then you owe me an answer."

"I don't. Folding is perfectly legal, and doesn't require either to acknowledge defeat. Folding is refusing to continue, which doesn't equate defeat. It's more of a stalemate."

Rey frowned, but couldn't really argue with him. "Fine." She thought about it a moment longer. "Would you still be willing to answer other questions?"

Ben thought about that possibility. "I suppose..." he conceded. She gave him a small smile. "But I reserve the right to fold again." Her smile slipped a bit, but she nodded in acknowledgement. She didn't want to force him to answer anyway. She'd rather he answer willingly. "Then ask away, if I can ask as well."

Rey nodded. She dealt out the cards again and Ben recognized that they were going to play rummy instead. "Rummy," she said, earning a nod from Ben as he collected his cards. Secretly, he hated cards, but if it meant that they could spend time together and talk, then maybe they weren't so bad. "What did you mean when you said you liked me?"

This woman... straight out the gate and she was asking him a question he already didn't want to answer. Though, he knew it had to be addressed. He swore it was obvious, but apparently, she was just trying to confirm something within herself. "I'm interested in you, as a partner," he stated as delicately as he could. He knew it was an uncomfortable subject, but it had to be said. And that was the only way he could say it, he supposed.

She blushed a little, but continued their card game anyway. "Your turn..." she whispered.

He glanced over at her and stared as she took her turn at the card game. He could tell she was nervous. Was it because of him? Was it because she didn't feel the same way? That she viewed him as just a hook up? And not a potential partner? All of these questions kept ambushing his thought processes, overwhelming him and crippling him all the same. He realized she was staring at him, concern marring her beautiful face. He blinked out of his stupor and looked down to his cards in his hand, lost in thought. "Sorry..." he mumbled.

"Are you ok, Ben?"

He sighed and shook his head. "It's nothing." He set a card down and Rey drew one to start her turn.

"It doesn't look like nothing. I may not know you that well... but I can tell when something's bothering someone. What is it?"

Ben frowned and pressed his lips together in a thin line. How should he answer? Anger was welling up inside of him, but not at her. No, never at her. He wanted so desperately to answer her. To tell her what he was thinking. What he was feeling. But the words just wouldn't come. It's like he had emotional constipation or something. (Tarzan reference!) He sighed in frustration. "I'm not exactly skilled in expressing feelings or thoughts that require delicate care."

"So then just say it and how it comes out is how it comes out. If I have questions, I can ask," she said simply.

He didn't like that. "That's just it. I can't." He sighed again and angrily drew a card as he berated himself in his own head. "There was never a need to express feelings in my house. Feelings were irrelevant. So to try to express them now is like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole."

"Even that's possible if you make the necessary adjustments though." He looked at her, frozen as he felt his brain accept that logic. Her smile kindly invited him to tell her what was on his mind. He sensed that she was so easy to talk to. It was a good thing, but it was also scary. The moment you let someone into your head was the moment you relinquished control to them. And Ben Solo never gave anyone control over him. "Ben... I'm not going to hold anything against you. Will you please tell me? We're supposed to be friends, right?"

Another frown marred his masculine face. Friends. He didn't want to be _friends_. He wanted her to be _with_ him. Friends wasn't anything special. But maybe he wasn't special enough to her... That thought saddened him as he sat there, thoughtlessly looking at the cards in his hands. Maybe he wouldn't ever be good enough for anyone to be something special to them. He was angsty, brooding, dark. Who would want someone like him as a partner? He wasn't special. He was just another guy that came across as a jerk with his lack of people skills. Her hand found his, delicately resting over his much larger ones. He followed her hand, up her arm, to her shoulder, then to her pleading face. She looked at him with such reverence, as if he mattered. It startled him. "Ben," she said gently as she kept her eyes on his.

He sighed and broke eye contact, opting to look at her hand on his and fighting the urge to entwine their fingers together. That may have been too intimate for her right now. "It's difficult to explain..."

"I'm clearly not going anywhere," she teased.

He let his lips twitch into a small smirk. She was willing to listen. To him. No matter what it was. She showed him that she truly was here for him. But he wondered how much longer she would be when she heard what he had to say. His eyes flickered up to her face briefly, only to hesitantly move his hand to hold hers. Not entwining their fingers, but just holding her smaller hand in his larger one. "I meant what I said. And I don't blame you if you don't feel the same. I can't explain it myself. I want you by my side." He glanced up at her to see her cheeks red with the admission, his eyes falling at their hands again. "But at the same time, I don't. I'm not lonely. I'm fine staying this way for the rest of my life, but it would be nice if... you would stay."

"Stay?"

"With me," he said as he looked into her eyes, a slight pink tinging his face.

"As in...?"

He sighed and reached across the table to gently curl his fingers behind her neck, pulling her to him. Their foreheads met as he closed his eyes and thought about the words, playing them in his head and realizing how silly they sounded. How repulsive they would sound to her. How stupid he would feel if she rejected him. "Be mine, Rey." His dark eyes met hers and he was surprised to see her smiling at him. "Plea-"

Rey silenced him in an instant, her hand going up to cup his face as her lips landed on his with a small laugh. Ben was frozen in place, unable to wrap his mind around what was happening at this instant in time. He just sat still, allowing the feeling to radiate through his body, unsure of how to respond. He really wasn't expecting this reaction from her. He expected her to be repulsed by him, to reject him, to tell him she didn't feel the same, nor would she ever. But this... this was a reaction he hadn't accounted for, but hoped for. She pulled away to give him one of her brilliant smiles he rarely saw when they were exchanging witty teases in the hallways. "One question..." Ben searched her eyes, feeling that apprehension creeping back up his chest and lodging itself in his throat. "When do we start?"


	4. Fear

**A/N: I love these two together. Jyn and Cassian are almost as good as this. Almost. Maybe. Whatever. Maybe not LOL Anyway... Awkward events ensue! Enjoy! R&R!**

* * *

**FIRE**

_Chapter 4: Fear_

* * *

The day had come and went. Her first day at Ben's apartment while hers was being fixed from the fire smell in her home. A lot had happened today. He'd kissed her in the hospital and all but begged her to come home with him. He'd admitted that he liked her as more than a friend. Went further, and told her that he was interested in her as a partner. And even further, by expressing his feelings for her that he wished to be with her. And what had she done throughout all of this? Struggled to return the sentiments. He knew how she felt because she accepted and asked when they would start dating, but he needed to _hear_ her say how she felt about him.

But the fear crippled her. Just as it had crippled him. There was a silent war being waged in her head as she thought out how she would tell him, and what she would say. Everything was so scary. She wasn't one to admit freely how she felt either. Maybe this was why they understood each other so well, because they both had issues expressing themselves. She wasn't sure. All she knew was that she liked him the same as he liked her. She had wanted to be with him, too, but was always too scared to communicate that to him. But he'd taken the first step so she didn't have to. Now, he was waiting for her to say something in return. But she couldn't.

She was so scared to admit her feelings. What if she got too involved too quickly and found out that they were incompatible? Her life would be ruined, as would his. She was scared to get in too deep. She thought it safer to be single. To keep to herself and swear off of a partner. Oh, but Ben was just right for her. He understood her. She understood him. It's like they were meant for each other. But what if they weren't? What if they were just deluding themselves because of some sort of sick infatuation with each other?

That thought scared her more.

Should she sit back and let things happen and withhold some of herself until she was sure that this was really true? Or should she just jump right in and put all herself into it, only to possibly be thrown against a jagged shoreline with nowhere to go? The thought of having a boyfriend scared her. He wanted to be with her. He took the first step. He was trying to overcome his fear, _for her_. Everything he had overcome, every step he'd taken toward her, was _for her_. To show her that she meant something to him. To show her that he truly felt something for her, and that it went beyond a physical attraction. No, he saw her inner person. He saw what no one else was allowed to see. How he had wiggled his way past her defenses, she didn't know, but it wasn't unwelcome. She rather liked having him that close to her. It was only a little scary that he could read her that easily though.

She emerged from the shower and saw the bedroom door closed with some clothes resting on the bed. She walked over to the clothes, wrapped in a grey fluffy towel, and looked down at them. They were hers? While she was showering, did he go into her apartment and get some clothes for her? No. She looked at the clothes closer. They were too large to be hers. She blushed. She remembered that all of her stuff smelled of smoke and fire. So these had to be his clothes. She felt her head swim as the blush intensified on her cheeks. She had taken a shower and hadn't even considered the possibility that she had no other clothes to wear. She hesitantly lifted the shirt and saw that it was black with a bit of blue on it. The pajama pants were black plaid. She bit her lip and hesitantly put them on, having no other choice. Once she was dressed, she looked in the long mirror off in the corner and admired herself. She liked how the shirt hung on her. She looked like a child in his pants though. She couldn't help but smile at how cozy they were. And the amount of respect that he'd shown her by closing the door behind him when she had clearly left it open out of habit of being alone.

She walked to the door of the bedroom and opened it, her eyes scanning the dimly lit living room and kitchen. He sat on the couch, flipping through the stations on the TV, idly passing everything by and coming back to where he started. She watched him with evident amusement. He had a lot on his mind. "I think the point of watching TV is to settle on a channel," she teased as she walked over to the couch and plopped next to him. He glanced over at her and gave her a small shy smirk. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." She gave him a look that showed him she wouldn't be lied to. He sighed. "Just thinking."

"About?"

He looked her square in the face. "You."

She gave him a smile, though hesitant and shy. "What about me?" He smirked at her and shrugged. "Ben," she warned.

Said man chuckled. "Just about the conversation we had earlier. That's it."

Rey frowned, but didn't push it. She moved closer to him and curled up next to him at his side as she let her eyes stare at the screen. "Is... this ok?" she asked softly.

Ben let his arm wrap around her and hold her there, kissing the top of her head. "Yes, Rey. Don't worry about it," he said as he stared at the screen, too.

A few minutes passed and Rey blurted out, "I'm scared."

His arm wrapped tightly around her, pulling her closer to try to comfort her. "Why?" he asked softly.

She hesitated and shrank into his side. "You're not the only one that can't really express themselves..."

Ben snickered. "I think we can figure it out."

Rey blushed and smiled at this man she'd grown comfortable with. "Maybe..."

"What are you scared of, Rey?" he asked, his voice deep and level. It sent reverberations in her chest, making her fight back a shiver.

"I..." Ben nudged her to sit up and she did. She looked unsure of herself. He hadn't seen this side of her before. The vulnerable side. He always saw the confident, teasing side of her that wasn't scared of anything. He watched her patiently. She was struggling as well. She couldn't find the words. He recognized that look. Knowing what you want to say, but being unable to get it out. He knew it all too well. "I'm scared to jump into this... whatever this is. That whatever we have isn't what we think it is and will be disappointed later."

"Like infatuation? And when the newness dies down, we'll both be dissatisfied?"

Rey looked at him then, awe in her eyes, but also a smile on her lips and a gratefulness reflecting her thoughts. "Exactly."

Ben gave her a small grin. "I felt the same."

"Felt?"

He nodded. "Would you rather... hold back and regret it later, saying 'I wish I could have done this...' or 'Why didn't I do that...' Or would you rather go all in and have no regrets later other than maybe you misjudged the feeling and liked it better as friends?" She thought about it. Somehow, what he said made sense. She thoughtfully nodded. "I'm not insinuating that we should jump in bed together and get married tomorrow. By all means, that's unnecessary," he teased with a small chuckle.

Rey laughed and gave him a warm smile. "Thanks, Ben," she said as she snuggled back up against him, her arm winding around his stomach as she sighed in content. "I think... I get your point. I think I'm still going to hold back a little, but... I'm going to try."

"Don't try too hard. It may seem forced," he reminded her as he laid his head back on the couch, eyes closing as he felt exhaustion start to take over him.

She nodded against his side. "Maybe we should go to bed," she said, earning a hum from him, but he made no move to let her go. She laughed as she sat up and kissed his cheek gently. "Good night, Ben," she said as she got up.

Ben opened his eyes and held her hand, pulling her back for a moment to stand in front of him. He leaned up and pressed his lips against hers lovingly, chastely. "Good night, Rey." She smiled and retreated to the bedroom, closing the door behind her as she offered one last smile to him through the crack. He got comfortable on the couch and sighed as he let exhaustion claim his consciousness.

**X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X**

A scream rang through the apartment, startling Ben awake and alert. He took a split second to survey the area. The door was still closed how she left it. The front door was still closed and locked at the deadbolt. But he had clearly heard a scream. He rose from the couch and rushed to the bedroom door, listening on the outside. He heard Rey panting and sobbing on the other side. He frowned as he knocked gently. "Rey?" he called, waiting for her to acknowledge him. It didn't happen. He hesitantly pushed the door open and peered inside, not entering the room until he was sure she was awake. "Rey? Are you all right?" He barely saw her curled into herself on the bed as she let out a soft sob. His frown grew as he entered the room and crossed the short space to the bed. He knelt at the side of the bed. "Rey?"

She threw her arms around him and tackled him to the ground. Well, would have if he hadn't been sturdy on the ground where he was. She threw herself at him and ended up landing in his lap as he wrapped his arms around her as she cried into his shoulder. He wanted to ask her what was wrong, but he remained silent as he held her, gently shushing her and rubbing her back softly. He knew she had a nightmare. He didn't know what it was about, but with as badly as it affected her, he was sure it was another fear that flashed before her eyes in her dreams. He didn't like that. He wished he could snatch whatever hurt her out of her mind and make her forget it. But that was just not realistic. All he could do was hold her and try to get her to calm down. "Ben," she breathed as her arms tightened around his neck.

"It's ok," he shushed. Inwardly, he felt awkward, having never comforted anyone before. He was trying to portray himself as comforting, but inside, he didn't know if he was doing it right at all. Did he need to ask? Should he wait until she wanted to talk? Should he hold her? Should he kiss her? Was this all right? He was so lost!

She sniffled and clung to him tightly. "I'm sorry to wake you up, Ben," she sniffled.

"Don't be. I'm more concerned about you than my sleep," he said with a small tease in his voice.

She let out a sad laugh. She pulled away slightly and wiped at her eyes. He got up and went to get her some tissue. When he came back, she was sitting on the bed and he sat next to her as he handed it to her. She wiped her face and sniffled. "There was another fire..." she whispered. He felt pity creeping into his heart. Though she put up a good front, he hadn't considered that she would have emotional difficulties with it. He silently cursed himself for not considering that. "I... you..." She wiped her face again. "We didn't make it." He remained silent still. He gingerly reached out and rubbed her back affectionately. "You died because of me..."

"What do you mean?" he asked softly.

More tears broke through her defenses as they streamed down her face. "You tried to help me and I tripped and hurt myself... So you tried to carry me... and..." She paused as she tried to collect herself. She tried not be a blubbering mess as she tried to talk. When she trusted herself to speak again, she took in a shaky breath. "The roof collapsed on top of you... I tried to help, but..."

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, pulling her head onto his chest. He ran his hands through her hair comfortingly and kissed the top of her head. "It was just a nightmare... It's not real."

She clung to him again, letting the tears spill out until she had no more to give. He remained patient as he held tight to her, letting her get out all of her anguish. He did take comfort in knowing that she was affected so deeply by his apparent death though. He felt his cheeks heat up when he acknowledged that she cared for him that much to feel terrible that he died. And that he had died, trying to save her. So she looked at him as if he were a hero? That he would risk his own life for her? It was true, but the fact that she dreamt that spoke volumes to him. He kissed the top of her head and realized that he was falling so deeply for her in such a short time. His lips twitched into the smallest of smiles. "Don't go..." she whispered. Ben looked down at her curiously, as if he was unsure if he heard that right. "Please stay with me..." she whispered again, clinging tighter to him.

He didn't know what to say. Sure, he was overjoyed that she wanted him to stay in the same room with her, but... was that really ok? He blushed at the implication. Would he sleep on the floor, which was what he was totally fine with to respect her space? Or was she expecting him to... "I'll... get my pillows and set up a spot on the floor," he said as he went to release her. She clung to him still, not ready to let him go.

"Can you..." Ben froze at the words. Was she not wanting him to sleep on the floor? Was she wanting _that_ kind of comfort? He wasn't ready to give that... Not until much later. This was too fast. He couldn't do- "Can you... lay with me?" she asked, embarrassing herself in the process. "In the bed?" she clarified. It was out. She asked. She felt stupid and inappropriate just asking him to do so.

Ben's mind, on the other hand, was short circuiting so badly. What was this woman wanting?! Relations? Cuddles? His presence to fall asleep? His mind was racing a million light years a minute. All of it seemed implausible. "Rey-"

Her cheeks burned as she realized how it came across. "Ben, no! Nothing inappropriate! I just... I wanted you to..." She groaned as she hid her face against his chest. "I didn't mean..." She sighed in defeat, realizing it just wasn't happening.

He chuckled then, really letting the laugh go, rather than trying to hold it in. She blushed when she realized that she really liked the sound, even if it was to her embarrassment. He kissed her head. "You want to cuddle?" She ducked closer to him and nodded shyly. "Ok, Rey," he chuckled. She looked up at him, face burning from embarrassment as her glassy eyes reflected her prior sadness. He held her face in his hands and gave her an actual smile, a real, heartfelt smile. "You're so cute," he chuckled as he pressed his lips to hers softly. She melted into his kiss and realized that her embarrassment was worth it because if not, she wouldn't have seen his amazing smile that she didn't even know was possible. When he pulled away, he saw the dazed look in her eyes. He grinned at her, kissing her chastely one more time. "Let's go to sleep."

Rey gave him a soft smile and nodded as she scooted into bed and laid on the side she assumed didn't have an occupant. She'd been sleeping on his side, she'd realized, when she tried to get comfortable. It was a little more worn than the other side, which, to Rey, showed a rather cute sleeping position. He stuck to one side, not rolling all over the bed like a bed hog. She, too, slept in one spot. She watched him crawl into bed, having been watched herself when she crawled into the opposite side of his usual spot. He found that he didn't mind so much that it was Rey on the unoccupied side. He'd never slept with anyone, even in an innocent way as now. But he had a feeling he would like it, and also allowed himself to think of the possibility of it happening again and again until it became the usual. He could see her taking up residence on that side of the bed, he realized, and the thought made his heart swell with happiness and hope.

As he crawled into bed, he laid onto his back and hesitantly shifted his usual position so that his arm was extended, offering her his shoulder to sleep on if she wanted it. He was glad she took it without delay, making him smile softly at her in the dark. As she snuggled up at his side, his long arm wrapped securely around her, holding her to his side. He placed a feather-light kiss to the top of her head once she settled in, relishing in her smell that invaded his nostrils. "Ben?" she whispered softly, a strange tone to her voice that conveyed... hesitation?

"Hm?" he breathed as he allowed his eyes to flutter closed, relishing in the feeling of having someone by his side. The warmth her body permitted him and her sweet, relaxing smell that quickly took over his senses like a Spanish conquistador in the inquisition. He was slowly getting lost in her presence, which was dangerous for him because when she left... he would be-

"Thank you," she whispered in a small voice that was uncharacteristic of such a strong woman.

He shifted to lay on his side so he could wrap both arms around her, tugging her closer against him as she too tried to gain that closeness without breaking boundaries. She let herself be pulled in by him, like a black hole in the middle of space, sucking in everything that came within reach. She was just as lost in him as he was in her. He planted a delicate kiss to her forehead. "Any time, Rey," he replied, his deep, low voice reverberating in her ears and making it impossible for her to hear anything else but the way he said her name in his sleep-drunk voice, allowing her to drift to sleep as she replayed it in her head, over and over and over again, like a mantra that demanded sleep.


	5. First

**A/N: RUNNING OUT OF F WORDS, BUT HAVE SO MANY PLACES THIS STORY COULD GO! I hate when I get overly ambitious... Speaking of, I was thinking about making a full-length story (15+ chapters) with this ABCs thing, but I'm not exactly sure how I could do that, or what letter to do it with. We shall see how that happens. I may end up scrapping that idea to work on the full-length one that I have in mind instead. We shall see. Enjoy! R&R!**

* * *

**FIRE**

_Chapter 5: First_

* * *

Ben awoke the next morning in the same place as he had drifted to sleep. It didn't take him long to orient himself. He briefly wondered if he was already oriented as he was coming out of sleep at the hyperawareness of her being in his arms the whole night. Nonetheless, he let out a sigh of content as he listened to the rhythmic breathing of the smaller woman against his large frame. His eyes finally opened, a glimpse of brown chestnut hair gracing his vision first. He allowed himself a small grin when he realized she'd shifted closer and up during the night. Towards her sense of comfort, maybe? He placed an almost unnoticeable kiss to her hair, his body springing to life at the brief hitch in her breathing. He hadn't meant to wake her up. He quickly closed his eyes, wondering if he could fool her with pretending to sleep. What would she do? He didn't know if she made it a habit to talk to herself, but he was eager to find out. Quickly, he leveled out his breathing and acted as if he were sleeping.

Rey's eyes opened as she let out a soft sigh of contentment, the same as he had done not too long ago. She realized how close he was and smiled softly to herself, Ben feeling the smile against his skin. He was partially grateful that he'd chosen a tank to sleep in, otherwise, he would have probably missed it. She placed a tentative kiss to the underside of his jaw and then retreated back into his embrace. She allowed her much smaller body to cling closer to his, as if clothes were getting in the way; that air itself was getting in the way of their closeness. Such a travesty, but a much welcomed one, Ben realized, as he knew he wouldn't have self control if they were wearing any less.

As she stayed in his arms, she idly let her fingers dance across his warm toned arms that held her so securely. This man had been an unlikely source of comfort to her. He'd been a first for a lot of things for her, she realized. The first to kiss her. The first to stay with her in the hospital in her whole life of many visits there. The first to confess to her as openly as an awkward person could. The first to drive her heart to beat harder than some outlandishly cranked up bass in a stereo system that threatened to eject her heart from her ribcage. The first to cuddle with her on a couch. The first to hold her while she slept. The first... that she woke up to beside her. Ben was first for many things. There was no way she could express her feelings to him. Would he think her insane? Was it too soon to say she loved him? That she needed him? He was the first person to make her mind race in so many different ways at once. It was welcomed, yet not. She was on fire, yet ice cold. She was drowning, yet flying all at the same time. Little by little, he was invading the reality that he'd slowly become a part of. The fact that she was starting to dread two days from now. The fact that... she didn't want to be separated from him.

She felt tears threaten to spill over her eyes at any moment as she curled closer still to Ben. The man who had shown her such kindness and expressed himself in such a way that made her fall for him that much more. She came to realize that all of this made sense. All of what they had, what they did, how they acted... all of it made sense. Like she had been fighting it for the longest time and now she finally gave in to it. She wondered if she was maybe moving far too fast. She had just told him last night that she was going to hold back, but her heart wouldn't allow her to do such a stupid thing. She didn't know if Ben was holding back, or if he wanted to. He hadn't been inappropriate with her or anything. She practically had to beg him to stay the night with her and hold her.

That was another thing. Had she forced herself upon him? Was all of this that she thought she sensed in him merely a fantasy? Was it real? She honestly didn't know. She didn't know anything. While she was content just being held by him, she also just wanted to scream at the top of her lungs how much she loved him. It was just three simple words, but they could make or break anyone's relationship or friendship. Those three words that were never said to her, and she wondered if they ever would be. Those three words that she both longed to hear, but dreaded to hear at the same time. It was so simple. She wanted to say it. She should say it. No, she shouldn't. She had to hold her tongue. She couldn't just say things like that an expect everything to be fine. They most certainly wouldn't be fine. Not this early in the game. He would take it that she was moving too fast and it would probably scare him off. Heck, if their roles were reversed, it would probably scare her off, too. She'd barricade herself in some room until she could go back home.

But they were there on the tip of her tongue, threatening to come out. To tell him how much she appreciated him. To tell him that she didn't want to be without him. To tell him that, despite barely knowing him, she already felt this bond with him that just made sense. She wanted to say what was on her mind. Her mouth wouldn't communicate. She tried to will her mouth to get used to the words. She had to say them sometime, right? If not to Ben, then to someone else. That thought pained her chest so she threw that thought out. No, it was Ben. Ben was the only one that understood her. The only one that gave a rip about her. The only one that took such time with her, despite knowing her circumstances. The man that sort of lied, just so he could be closer to her in the hospital and find out how she was doing first hand. The man that... despite his own discomfort (because let's face it, hospital chairs are so uncomfortable), stayed with her until she woke up. The man that captured her interest. That captured her affection. Why couldn't she say those three words to him? What was so hard? Just say it! _I love you! I love you. I... love... you..._

"I love you, Ben," she whispered, her voice relaying she was in a thoughtful daze. She felt Ben's body stiffen around her and she realized she let it slip. Her own body stiffened in his grasp, wondering if he heard her. Judging by the heat that sprang to life on his cheeks, and the set of eyes that were staring back at her, wider than the gaping chasm she felt in her chest at the mistake that just befell her. He was awake. He heard her! "B-Ben-"

"Again," he breathed, as if wondering if he heard her right. She stared at him curiously. Could she change what she said? Make up something similar sounding to it to get him off of her tail? But what really sounded similar to those words without sounding utterly ridiculous? She felt him shifting so he could gently hold her face, his face softening as he gazed, silently pleading with her, to repeat herself. "Rey... say it again," he whispered, his own heart racing a million miles a minute, she heard.

She blushed darkly as she stared into his eyes, noticing the subtlety of how his lip quivered and his breaths were shaky, as well as the gentle hand on her face. This suspense was killing him. It was breaking him down. She sucked in a sharp breath when she allowed herself to hope that, for just a moment in time, that maybe... maybe he felt the same she did. It was what coaxed her to say it again, at his request. "I... I love... you."

And then, as if someone decided to have mercy on her bumble, she saw his face contort with such a brilliant, loving smile that she thought she'd pass out from the sheer beauty of it. The way the corners of his mouth curled up, revealing the subtle dimples on his cheeks. His lips stretched into a beautiful, heartfelt smile as his normally dark eyes were a brilliant shade of melted amber as they watered before her. She felt the delicate caress of his thumb on her cheek as he stared at her with that beautiful smile that seared itself into her mind, never to be forgotten. He pressed his lips urgently to hers, spurring her own body to react in such a way that they didn't seem like two people anymore; no, they were now one. Their heartbeats melded together into one synchronized beat, their lips moving furiously on each other's, as if they were each other's only life line to keep from sinking in the world. Her own hands held his face, pulling him closer to her as tongues met in a flurry of passion and... love.

He pulled away so they could get their breath back, that beautiful smile on his face as his forehead met hers. She bit her lip in suspense. Sweet relief came just in time. "I love you, Rey," he whispered with just as much admiration for her as he felt. It was her turn to experience all these feelings she'd never felt before. She'd felt a deep gaping hole for so long, as if no one cared about her, or ever would. That deep chasm swiftly closed itself up, like two sides of a parted sea that finally came back to each other in a furious slosh of water as it mingled and rejoined as one. It shook her to the core that hearing those words, with her name on his glorious lips, would do something so earth shaking. She felt her heart beating so hard it threatened to crack a rib, each hammer a swift punch to her insides as it pulsed a loud beat into her ears. Her face was twenty shades of red deeper as she felt her own lips pulling in a wide brilliant smile that showed her childish side. If she was any less of a woman, she would have giggled right then and there, but she restrained herself as she threw her arms around him and pulled him close to her, wanting to hide the tears that were now spilling down her face. She was loved. She was wanted. She was needed.

_By him_.

He chuckled at her reaction before he placed an affectionate kiss to her temple, his hand rubbing up and down her back, as if feeling this was really real and not just a sick, twisted fantasy that his mind deluded him with. She was here. She was really here in his arms. And she'd reciprocated his feelings. Ben felt his world suddenly morphing into something other than a monochrome hell. His world started to burst with color. The only color that she could provide him. His ray of sunshine broke through his dark gloomy clouds effortlessly. All it took were those three simple words that held so much promise, yet so much fear. And she'd told him first.


	6. Forever

**A/N: Sorry about the short chapter last time! It's like 6am and I'm so tired lol Anyway... I think this will be the last chapter for this story. Thank you to all who have read so far! And if it was rushed, the only thing I have to say about that is... when you know, you know. And they knew. Enjoy! R&R!**

* * *

**FIRE**

_Epilogue: Forever_

* * *

Rey's apartment had never gotten done. They said it was too far damaged. Apparently, the electric was shot and they couldn't get the smoke smell out of her walls. How they managed to get it out of Ben's, who was closer to the fire, but not hers, she'll never know. But it worked out anyway because they'd decided long ago that it was far more comfortable to sleep next to someone than wake up alone. Time ran on for the two, having lost track of the year that had passed by so quickly, like sand down an hourglass. Things were going smoothly. Sort of. They butted heads, but they were able to recover quickly. They had this understanding between each other. That when the other was too angry, they would say they loved each other. At first, it seemed silly. But they both realized the significance of that statement.

They weren't alone anymore. They'd chose each other. They'd found comfort in each other and the last thing they wanted to do was to push each other away. Especially over some stupid little argument. Those three words held such power over them that it was able to break any trance of anger that sprung up between them. They'd pushed each other's limits and found where the boundaries were. But because they were both so stubborn, they often tested those boundaries over and over again, despite warnings.

And today was one of those days.

Rey huffed as she got out of bed and walked to the kitchen to make some coffee. Ben had said that he needed to get a shower and Rey was reluctant to get up, but she knew he needed one. He wanted her to join him, but she was on her period and she didn't want to do that. So he'd gotten upset, but he understood. However, despite him saying he was all right and he understood, Rey knew there was something wrong because he was short with her. So, rather than address it, she stormed out of their room to get some coffee. She felt the hormones rushing through her, aggravating her already sensitive emotions as she glared at the coffee pot. What were they even arguing about? She didn't even know... She just felt really mad all of a sudden. And Ben asking her to bathe with him wasn't making it any better.

She snatched a blue and black coffee cup that Ben had bought her a while back and started to pour her own coffee. She slammed the pot back down and groaned as another cramp hit her, tensing her whole body in agony as she all but doubled over at the counter. She let it pass and sighed in aggravation, tears prickling at the corners of her eyes as a wave of unwanted sadness started to take over her. She felt arms wrap around her gently, his face nuzzling her hair affectionately. "It's ok," he whispered as he kissed the back of her head, gently rubbing her stomach.

She let him hold her for a minute, but then she felt this overwhelming amount of anger towards him. "How would you know?" she hissed back at him as she spun out of his grasp, glaring at him. Ben just stared at her curiously, a small smirk on his lips. "What are you smirking at?"

Ben shrugged. "Nothing in particular."

"Liar." Ben chuckled. "What's so funny?!"

Ben looked at her, his eyes intense and smoldering. "I love you, Rey," he said as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her lips tenderly. She sighed against him, but didn't fight. She wrapped her arms around him and leaned into him, making him tangle his hand in her hair as she cocked her head just enough to deepen the kiss.

After a moment, she pulled away and half-heartedly punched his arm. "Jerk."

"_Your_ jerk," he amended with a grin.

She snickered. "I'm so lucky," she said with a roll of her eyes, her tone playful and bored at the same time.

"I mean... there's the door if you think you'll find better."

She glared at him, a new wave of anger coming on again. "Shut up," she hissed at him, pulling away, but he held her tight against him. "Let go, Ben."

"It was a joke, Rey."

"That's not a joke, Benjamin," she hissed angrily, her eyes threatening to spill more tears.

He kissed her forehead. "Sorry." She looked away and glared at the floor. "I don't want you to leave anymore than you do," he admitted gently as he kissed her cheek exposed to him.

"Don't joke like that... You already know I'm having trouble..."

He chuckled again, earning him a glare from the woman in his arms. "You're not that bad."

She scoffed. "Right. Wanting to rip a hole in your throat one minute and cry enough to flood the apartment isn't bad. Gotcha."

He gently hooked his finger under chin and turned her head to look at him. When their eyes met, he gave her a small sympathetic smile. "It's ok, Rey. Don't worry about it. I know you don't mean half the things you're saying or doing. I understand it's hormones." She softened a little at him as she offered a brief nod. "But maybe we should get you something for the pain," he said with a small smirk.

She blushed and shrugged. "Maybe..."

"I'll be right back," he promised as he kissed her forehead and released her. He retreated to their bathroom, leaving Rey to stand at the counter to sip her coffee. She wiped her eyes and sighed in frustration at her emotional havoc her hormones were wreaking. When he returned with a bottle of Pamprin, she gratefully took the small pink pills and sighed as she waited for them to work. "Do those actually work?" he asked curiously.

"Yes. I don't feel the overwhelming urge to murder you in your sleep." She laughed as he quirked a brow at her.

He leaned closer to her, arms on either side of the counter, his face inches away from hers. "You'd be lonely if you did."

"Would I?"

"You would."

She grinned at him. "How do you know?"

He leaned just a hair closer so their lips barely touched, but she could feel the movement of his lips as he spoke. "You can't sleep without me anymore. Remember when I worked late? You were still up when I got home." She blushed when she realized he got her there. He grinned against her lips. "I can't sleep either."

"No duh. You can't sleep while you're working, Ben."

He smirked at her. "I'm serious, Rey," he said as he pulled back just a bit to look at her face. She pouted at the loss of their closeness, but stared at him quietly. He lifted a hand to gently cup her cheek, his thumb caressing the soft skin there. "I don't want to sleep without you anymore. I can't."

Rey's brows furrowed in confusion. "Ben, what's going on with-"

He kissed her lips to hush her and she caught the hint when he pulled away. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

He gave her a small hesitant smile. "Then stay with me." Rey opened her mouth, but he continued. "Forever."

Her eyes widened a hair. Confusion was swirling in and out of her depths as she searched Ben's eyes for any sign or inclination that would show her what he was asking. She only found mirth and amusement. And... pleading? No matter how many times she tried to run it through her head, she didn't understand what he was asking. She needed to ask, but she knew she'd seem really stupid. Oh, who cares. It was just them. "Forever?"

Ben grinned as he pulled away from her and reached into his pocket. He pulled out a small box and set it open on the counter, pushing it towards her. "Forever," he confirmed.

She looked at the ring inside and blushed when she realized what he was asking. Tears started to well in her eyes as she jerked her head back to look at Ben, who was waiting patiently as he smiled softly at her. She looked back at the ring he'd presented to her. A promise of forever. A promise that he'd love her forever. That he'd be with her forever. That they didn't need to separate again. Her lips started to pull into a loving smile as she picked up the box and plucked the ring from it. She looked it over for a few long seconds and then slid it onto her left ring finger. She smiled up at him. "Forever sounds good to me."

He gave her an affectionate smile and kissed her lips lovingly, Rey answering by wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him closer. He wrapped his arms around her lithe body and pulled her flush against him. Forever sounded good to him, too. And their forever was starting right now. Together. When they pulled away, Rey laughed gently. "How long had you been planning that?" she asked with a small smile.

He gave her a grin. "Long enough."

"Did you know I would say yes?"

Ben shrugged. "I hoped you would."

Rey smiled at him. "I love you, Ben."

He gave her a wide grin as he held her hand that wore the ring. "Forever?" he asked as he kissed her knuckles, eyes still glued to hers.

She gave him a warm smile. "Forever."


End file.
